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The Road Before & After Surgery
January 7, 2018
Take Heed Of The Signs...
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: Day 2924-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Take heed of the signs... for they have valuable meaning.

Lately, I have been seeing a lot of signs.

Signs that have been visible at the most peculiar times. Or... when absolutely, least expected. Do they all have meaning? If they don't then I sure believe this all to be some really strange and quite odd coincidence. Nah. No way. There is a valuable meaning behind these signs that we have been literally walking upon lately.

I believe in fate. I believe that the universe can guide you into the right direction. A mere complete turn around from your past. A far happier road to a much more happier journey. If only you take heed of the signs that are all around you.

Between waking up from another very vivid dream. Only to look up at the television and see once again, another sign. I did a bit of online research to see if others had the same occurrence during a surgical procedure. Very vivid visions of being somewhere else. Only to awaken in disappointment of being sent back. It isn't the first time this has happened to me. I know it won't be the last. But it seems as well upon research that many, many others have had the same similar experiences. Signs. They do have a special meaning. I know mine are being directed to me. To us. Through those that have passed on and watching over us from heaven. It isn't something I believe. It is something that I firmly know.

The chances of walking outside to get the mail and looking down in the snow to see a bright red berry of some sorts. Then having that gut feeling to go back and pick it up. It was not only a sign. But a sign from someone not of this world. The chances of that very little red berry with a white heart engraved on the other side not only took me by complete surprise. But I finally received the last bit of signs that we had been looking for in such a very long time. An approval of sorts with regards to major decisions that will bring with them... major changes in our life.

2018 is going to be a big year for our entire little family.

Thanks to those who continue watching over us.

Thank you for the signs that helped us to make some very big, life changing decisions.


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 8, 2018 10:59 PM EST
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January 6, 2018
Tis A Great Day To Take It Easy... Indoors! :)
Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: Day 2923-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


I may be the only one right now really enjoying this extreme cold weather so early in the winter season. A long awaited break from far too many warm winter seasons. If only we could add a bit more snow to the mix... ahhhhh... that would be heavenly! Last nights temperatures heading back from the hospital dipped to a rare zero degrees. Although this isn't the coldest we have seen over the past few weeks. It is pretty rare to see zero and below zero temperatures. The only downside to this super cold winter weather are the double size record utility bills that hit our mailbox today. Our bill literally doubled from just the month prior! Even our high efficiency furnace couldn't keep up with the constant demand for warmth. This might not only be a record cold winter season. But also a record season for extremely high utility bills! Crossing our fingers for some available overtime at the sheriffs department!

Until then... tis a great day to enjoy the great outdoors via a room with a view. Actually our living room with a huge window view of some rather large visitors. It never gets old looking up to see a new visitor or two from all the deer that surround the wooded hillside. You know... someone has to feed god's creatures, both big and small. We continue to be fortunate to be a part of those someone's. Nothing fancy, just a few homemade food stations to provide something to eat for all the wildlife visitors through out the cold winter season.

At least Papa and Sweetie kitty are doing very well with their temporary shelter in the basement during these cold winter months. Other neighborhood friendly felines have also taken indoor shelter with other neighbors. I will say one thing about our area here in the country. The love for all animals runs deep! If there is a stray, you can certainly bet that someone will be opening their doors. Having more than one fur child is very common in our little, lazy, river town. It's not uncommon for a typical household to have more than 3 fur children at a time. Especially during the past few weeks when even those that have gotten lost are still welcomed with open arms. Seeking temporary shelter in a strangers home.

Unity is a really big theme when you live outside of the big cities. Back in Ohio... unity was pretty much obsolete. What I enjoy most about living in a much smaller community within a little, lazy, river town is the closeness among families. Folks here live together, as one, including the grandparents. Together under one roof. The way it used to be. I have lost track of how many times we have seen an entire family get out of their car... together. The love that is shared among family in a very small tightknit community.

There is something to be had... when seeing the love among family. It never gets old... never.

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 8, 2018 10:04 PM EST
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January 5, 2018
Remember That One Time...
Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: Day 2922-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Remember that one time... when you said that one of these days you are going to sleep for an entire day.

Yep... today was that day.

I'll be darn if I am not once again, backtracking my blog entries.

Not only that... but I literally slept for over 24-hours. Not of course counting the times that Eric woke me up for meds and consuming something to drink. This of course is what happens when your body is fighting a nasty post-surgical infection.

Once again, my body temperature and blood pressure did a major dip. Another trip to the hospital meant staying long enough to get a bit of IV medication support. Long enough to receive a few good drugs to help me sleep for over 24-hours.

This past surgery was tough! Yet... I still have another upcoming surgery to remove a cancerous skin lesion in less than 2 weeks. I also have a few more surgeries still left to endure once I make a full recovery from my most recent surgery. Two separate surgical procedures to replace bone that had to be cut back due to tumors causing the initial infection. Bone that literally crumbled on my surgeon. But first... I must make a full recovery. It's like another flashback from surgery a little over several years ago that started this entire mess. A surgical procedure that turned out anything, but normal. An ovary that literally crumbled as well on them. Scary enough... there seems to be quite an eerie pattern going on here with my body. A very bad pattern.

Physically... something good has to give... right? RIGHT!

Five months from now seems pretty darn fair to me in order to recover from my recent surgery. They say that skin cancer is the most common, yet also the easiest to endure as far as having the lesions removed. I can only hope that the second time around, as far as surgeries, goes a lot smoother than this one! I guess we will find out come later next week when I meet with my other surgeon. What a way to start a new year... but tis only to be expected when you continue fighting an uphill battle.

This too shall pass. It really is true... what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

A hell of a LOT STRONGER. Amen.



Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 8, 2018 9:05 PM EST
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January 4, 2018
To My Wife
Now Playing: Day 2921-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


The World

Brad Paisley

To the teller down at the bank
You're just another checking account
To the plumber that came today
You're just another house
At the airport ticket counter
You're just another fare
At the beauty shop at the mall
Well, you're just another head of hair
Well, that's alright, that's okay
If you don't feel important, honey
All I've got to say is

To the world
You may be just another girl
But to me
Baby, you are the world

To the waiter at the restaurant
You're just another tip
To the guy at the ice cream shop
You're just another dip
When you can't get reservations
'Cause you don't have the clout
Or you didn't get an invitation
'Cause somebody left you out
That's alright, that's okay
When you don't feel important, honey
All I've got to say is


To the world
You may be just another girl
But to me
Baby, you are the world

You think you're one of millions
But you're one in a million to me
When you wonder if you matter, baby, look into my eyes
And tell me, can't you see you're everything to me?

That's alright, that's okay
When you don't feel important, honey
All I've gotta say is

To the world
You may be just another girl
But to me
Baby, you are the world

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 5, 2018 1:12 AM EST
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January 3, 2018
Carry On!
Mood:  lucky
Now Playing: Day 2920-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


It's been almost a week since surgery. My how time really does fly by! So far... things have been going well with surgical recovery. It's been a slow, work in progress.


GI wise... well... that's another story. Side effects from anesthesia that put your entire digestive tract to sleep for almost an entire week. Tis reasons for not so much fun extreme nausea and waves of vomiting. The unwillingness to consume much of anything. Protein shakes... well... they haven't been too easy to consume either. But all is expected when you find yourself dropping a few pounds of weight. But you know what? These are just minor things. They are just minor set backs.

I have the world  ahead of me!

My surgeon had me come into his office today during his lunch break in order to address issues with another post-operative infection. Not only is my digestive system extremely slow when it comes to an anesthetic state of sleep. But so is my overall healing process. My body is just now beginning to show signs of healing. Crazy! At least all of the surgical bruising is finally starting to fade away. One grows tired of hiding indoors in fear that some folks will assume that Eric is a wife beater of some sorts. HAHAHAHA! No worries... we already had to explain my bruising to a few at our local bank. BAH! Even my surgeon's assistant got in a few of her own funnies regarding odd, but normal for me, various shades of bruising that is just now beginning to fade away. As she told my surgeon, "I sure hope she didn't give out the name of who did her surgery!" Hahahahaha! Once again... being called the 'special patient,' with some really special post-operative complications like another nasty infection. Another procedure, but a far shorter one today in order to drain the infection.

Eric wasn't given every little detail with regards to what my surgeon encountered during last weeks surgery. But today we both got full details of not just problems with my far too low blood pressure issues. But as well with bone tumors that literally crumbled on my surgeon which meant the need to cut far deeper than anticipated. Surgical incisions that we were told will take up to 5 months to heal. We were also told that I will need to have a few additional surgeries, surgical implants, to replace bone that had to be removed within the entire upper left portion of my jaw. I don't need to go into any further detail on how fortunate one can be to have such an amazing surgeon with decades of handling such highly complex cases as my unique case. Let's just say that sometimes pictures say more than a thousand words. I will handle the changes within the structure of my face. I will prepare, once again, for the necessary upcoming surgeries.

At the end of the day. It truly isn't the end of the world. It is just the beginning of one very lucky journey.

This evening, I received another call that will change my life for the better. Production will carry on into this new year out west. YAYYYY! WOO~HOO!! I can't wait for the opportunity to share some additional details! I am thankful for the producers who have not only remained patient with me, working around some unforeseen surgeries. But who still believe in this long awaited project for the world to see.

2018 is going to be one AMAZING year!

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 5, 2018 12:32 AM EST
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January 2, 2018
The Road Before & After Surgery
Mood:  vegas lucky
Now Playing: Day 2919-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining









The Road Before & After Surgery/Gastroparesis Life 2018
Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining
Sharing my journey with others in hopes of inspiring the great fight for life!




The realization that you are in a pretty dark place in your life is never easy. But, that realization is the very first step to lifting yourself out of it. My saving grace is going to come from multiple methods. Be it finding new connections with other brave souls also realizing their dreams, taking up new hobbies, small weekend trips traveling during my good days and self reflecting on what I can change during my bad days. Maybe this next phase in my life might include learning a new language, a new exercise routine, or realizing a huge passion of mine which includes opening up an animal sanctuary.

When I unwillingly landed in a place such as where I stand now at this point in my life, now looking back in hindsight, that bright light that always helped me out, was my silver lining.


Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining




Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 3, 2018 3:48 AM EST
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January 1, 2018
Mood:  vegas lucky
Now Playing: Day 2918-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining



I like to call it the year of MANY silver linings!

Sheer happiness... YOURS for the taking!

I can't say that we woke up this morning with a hangover. Alcohol related anyways. HA! But I sure am finally feeling the side effects from anesthesia and other strong narcotics that are slowly coming out of my body. Gastroparesis means not only a super slow, turtle pace digestion system. But it also means taking ten times longer than most folks when it comes to weaning anesthesia and other drugs out of your system. I may not fully feel the surgical cuts just yet. But I sure the heck feel the side effects of severe nausea that comes with anesthesia! Tis was not a very good day to kick off a new year. What I have been doing is a whole lot of resting. Enough sleeping that could last me for the remainder of the year! BAH. I feel for Eric once he goes back to work, on any anything but a normal sleep schedule. For the first 48-hours he barely got any sleep during and after surgery. Let's just say that we both finally were able to catch up on some serious sleep. Much needed rest for the body.

With a new year, comes with it, new resolutions.

My resolutions had already began a few days ago. I plan on sticking to mine this new year which involves continuing to close doors on relationships that no longer serve me well. Relationships that are clearly not healthy for me nor the rest of our little family. I also vowed to change how I respond to highly combative and hostile conflict. I promise you one thing. I will no longer take place in any sort of dysfunctional family behavior. It has now taken a permanent place... in the past. I will no longer subject myself to any unhealthy relationships of any sorts. That includes any ridiculous shenanigans that only lead to further overwhelming stress. I can not take back the past. But I can change the present and the future on what I will and will not allow as unhealthy in my life. Unhealthy for our entire little family.

I also plan on making another huge and permanent change this new year. After over 15 years of having the same phone number. I will be changing my cell phone number. A private number in order to make sure that a peaceful life remains here on out for me and my future. I will be sending out a group text message for those once my number has been changed. This is just one of many positive changes that I plan on making for this new year. Cursing is also a thing of the past. Sure, we all slip up with choice words from time to time. But I have come to realize that those slipped words only come with a few that were not healthy as far as relationships in my past. When you rid of what no longer serves you well... you rid with it... behavior that no longer serves you well. Negativity, slip-up words and a lot of upside frowns.

This New Year 2018 is all about change for the better!

Happiness is yours for the taking if you learn to open yourself up to what you truly deserve. All the happiness that life has to offer you! Never settle for less than what you deserve. Never compromise your self worth. Never, ever give anyone the chance or opportunity to steal away your beaming ray of light, a most beautiful smile and that undeniable sheer happiness!



Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 3, 2018 2:58 AM EST
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December 31, 2017
There Is No Place That I Would Rather Be... Home For New Years Eve :)
Mood:  special
Now Playing: Day 2917-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


You know what I have learned over the past year?

There is no better place than the place we call, home.

There is no place that I would rather be... home on New Years Eve.

I remember past New Years Eve festivities that meant getting dressed up and living it up with really large, loud and mostly drunk crowds. Hahahahaha! Hey, I am just keeping it real! Really honest. Not to say that there weren't a few times that we might had been a part of those drunkin' crowds. Ha! That is also keeping it real. Really honest. Hahahaha! Not this year though... no way... no how.

This year we will be ringing in a new year with all the comforts, joy and unconditional love from our fur children at home. It sure beats the hospital! A place where there is no sleep. Unless you are in a drug induced state of mind. Yes, there is actually sleep to be had in such a place. So much sleep that when I finally got the opportunity to rest on my own couchbed. I still had a hard time waking back up. We almost missed the opportunity to bid farewell to 2017. Welcoming in a far happier new year! Doing so as a family... together.

But such as luck would have it as clearly luck remains on my side. I woke up at exactly 11:45pm. Enough time to wake Eric up who was sleeping next to me on the couch so we could quickly turn on the television and watch the countdown together. A new year. A new me. A far HAPPIER 2018!


2017 was one heck of a year for our entire little family. It was a year of great loss. Losing fur children that meant the world to all of us as they took a little piece of our hearts back home with them to heaven. It sure wasn't the same this holiday season. But I know they were still here with us, celebrating the love and joy that comes with this magical time of year. We suffered great loss in 2017. We also learned a great deal in 2017. In the process we have become much more wiser and far more respectful to the greatest gift of all.

The gift of life.

Farewell 2017. The tried and the true. As we remember those we love, but never truly lost. Our hearts will always be with you~

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
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December 30, 2017
A Special Gift.
Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: Day 2916-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


I believe in signs. I believe in gut instincts. I also believe there was very valid reason that two surgeries had to be postponed, time and time again.

This is the first blog entry of quite a few that I am beginning to catch up on this evening. Going back in my mind of the past week. Actually... the end of 2017 and the beginning of a new year... 2018.

There was every bit of a really good valid reason on why surgical procedures had to be rescheduled over the past few months. Physically, my body just wasn't ready. Mentally, I had yet to close some doors in my life... permanently. I most definitely believe that no matter what type of surgery you are having to any part of your body. You must first be ready in every way, shape and form. Physically, spiritually and emotionally.

After finally putting all the silly shenanigans away that had been causing me stress and the inability to focus on far more serious issues. I finally had the opportunity to focus on far more important matters with my health... surgery. It may have taken awhile, but this morning was the first step in realizing two long awaited surgeries. It wasn't a choice. It was a must. Regardless of what type of surgery you may endure at some point in your life. There will always be risks involved with going under the knife. For those whom may never have to endure any type of surgery in your lifetime. Consider yourself lucky.

With any surgery, comes the risks that are involved when you go under anesthesia.

As I am now taking the time to catch up on blog entries over the past week. I am very fortunate to now be on the other side of surgery... recovery. The safe side after suffering surgical complications. Having pre-existing issues places anyone at a far greater risk of surgical complications. This is why when surgery is a must, not an option. One must be prepared both physically and mentally. It takes one heck of a surgeon to be okay with not just taking on my highly complex, complicated medical case. But to also understand that surgical complications can sometimes not be avoided, no matter how many precautions one may take before surgery. And I must say... my surgeon took a lot of measures in order for me to have the safest surgery possible. Without complications. But you can't predict the unpredictable.

I do not have much recollection of the next 24-hours during and after surgery. But I can tell you one thing. There is an afterlife. I am not sure what you would call as far as what I was able to remember with going to a specific place and remembering one very particular face. One particular face that I have never met before in this lifetime. But after finally waking up and coming to while looking down to see Eric holding my hand. The very first words that Eric said came out of my mouth were of those perfectly describing his grandmother. I know where I went and I know who was waiting for me. Along with others whom I can only hope to one day put names with those faces that surrounded me.

This isn't the first time to have encountered such a place that not only enlightened me. But angered me that I had to leave such a peaceful, beautiful place outside of anything of this world. I believe that place to be called, heaven.

Thanks to our dear friend, Mary and our very first live Christmas tree. Our friendship with Mary is a very special and most sacred one. We both share a very special gift. The gift and ability to connect.


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 3, 2018 1:01 AM EST
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December 29, 2017
ALL Clear Ahead! ;)
Mood:  lucky
Now Playing: Day 2915-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Call me crazy... but I actually don't mind the cold temperatures this morning.

Winter is my favorite season!

After layering my clothes and bundling up with the biggest and warmest coat I could find. Yesterday morning was the truest test of all time to see if I could pass pre-surgical testing for this mornings scheduled surgery.

1 out of 2 over the next few weeks.

My guardian angels must had been by my side. I finally got the long anticipated words, "ALL clear ahead!" FINALLY! This has been a very long time coming! This also can only mean one thing and one thing only. Kenny and Briannna, I not only survived 13 years. But I plan to live 13 plus years more! Amen.

 It's amazing what a huge fire-of-words from others can do for ones outlook on life. The fire within ones soul gets an instant re-ignite!

I will always have low blood pressure issues. I will always have a lower than normal body temperature. That comes with tumors and cancer in general. But this morning as I finish typing... 7:54am. We are getting dressed and on our way to my first of two surgeries. I plan on continuing to battle. Realizing my dreams along the way for a much happier, time to take care of #1~ME... New Year 2018!

Once I am released, there will be plenty to keep our fur children busy while mommy is home finishing up her smooth road to recovery. Yes, as we were told, things will be different after this surgery. Life, once again, will change. But those words couldn't be handed down to a much stronger person. There isn't anyone else that I know that is stronger than me. The one person that I know who is stronger happens to be watching over me from heaven. I am forever blessed by the strength they have handed down to me.

Thanks to those who will be keeping an eye on our fur children. Thank YOU for inspiring me through out my journey. Those who are also bravely battling to live to see another day. KEEP ON! KEEPING ON all YOU brave Viking Warriors!

"Don't let mediocre people talk you out of your dreams. Lions have little in common with sheep."

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 7:53 AM EST
Updated: December 29, 2017 7:54 AM EST
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