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The Road Before & After Surgery
February 4, 2018
Well... Looks Like A Little Someone Took Over Super Bowl Sunday! :)
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Day 2951-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


What a great way to kick off Super  Bowl Sunday!

While other folks are out celebrating with huge festivities, lots of food and plenty of beer... not I.

This evening was a wonderful opportunity to bundle up as if one was heading out to hike the great Antarctic! Time to hit the walking trails along the river! There is always something quite magical about the energy along the river... even enjoying the very first snowflakes gently falling from the sky as I came back home, peacefully content.

Eric had planned on watching the Super Bowl, however, Babyblue had other plans in mind while claiming the television remote.


Hehehehehehe! I mean come on now... who could say no to such a cutie patootie! With her super comfy winter sweater on and a square stuffed animal friend in hand (paw), Babyblue enjoyed her very first Puppy Bowl! Of course, Snoreo was close by... however out of embarrassment of watching the puppy bowl, he quickly hid from the camera lens. Hehehehehehe!

Life... it truly, undeniably, absolutely is... the little things that bring the most joy to my heart~

**Join us for Babyblue's first Puppy Bowl video on our Podcast-Blogcast... Our Crazy Little Life**


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 11:19 PM EST
Updated: February 4, 2018 11:24 PM EST
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February 3, 2018
Pay CLOSE Attention To Your Dreams! :)
Mood:  lucky
Now Playing: Day 2950-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Talking about sweaty palms!

It sure isn't my first rodeo launching a new website. But I sure didn't expect to hit as many glitches in such a short amount of time. Finally... the website is now up and running, yet, far from complete. It's only the beginning of something far bigger and super EXCITING!

What hasn't been exciting over the past 24-hours is the new medication. Another new experimental, therapeutic medication that I will be taking over the next few weeks. At least up until my scheduled surgery date. I really didn't want to start another new drug, especially anything that is still in the experimental phase of sorts. But somehow, someway, I found the courage within and decided to give the medication a try late yesterday evening. The first initial hit with side effects began early this morning. But as always, I once again found my strength within and pushed through the discomfort. This gal has lots on her full plate and not everything is medical related. There is still a really super exciting production in the works which will pick up later this spring. When you have a really amazing idea and a really compassionate, beyond understanding producer, anything and everything is possible! Even... while still battling the medical demons within.

Life doesn't stop, just because your sick. No way. No how!

A little sneak peak on a new restaurant concept that is sure to bring lots of smiles and sheer delight! You know those really vivid dreams... the ones where you wake up and remember every single little detail. The really big dreams in full color! I had a dream many months ago. A very vivid dream, in color, that led me to reach out to an investor. That same dream also had me realizing another goal of mine as I represented myself and finally acquired a temporary work permit while still fighting my way to one day also... embrace a cure. It may have taken me awhile to get through the medical hurdles so I could continue pushing forward, onward and one day soon... realize that dream. A really amazing dream!

Right now, I have other important items on the ole agenda. Surgery in less than 3 weeks, followed by 15-weeks of important outpatient therapy. I plan on multi-tasking to the highest of my ability! Even while recovering from surgery and yes... even during outpatient therapy. There really is nothing one can't accomplish with a laptop in hand and a dream in their heart~

YOU have all the reasons in the world to achieve your grandest dreams.



Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 1:02 AM EST
Updated: February 3, 2018 1:09 AM EST
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February 2, 2018
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Day 2949-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining



It's been a long time in the making as we transition from our blog of many years at the Gastroparesis Awareness Campaign website, to now this amazing new site here at PodBean.

I know... I know... change can sometimes be a bit hard, but I am so glad that you could join us on this new adventure with so many more BLOGSTASTICLY FUN features! Endless capability for photos, audio and even my latest new hobby... videography. Talking about a funtastic, superbloggy, videotoggy, audiolicious blog on steroids of sorts!

Time to get comfy, grab a blanket and your favorite beverage and CHEERS to this crazy adventure in this place we call, life. 

Get ready for lots of smiles & plenty of laughter!




Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 11:28 PM EST
Updated: February 2, 2018 11:31 PM EST
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February 1, 2018
We're UP! Then We're D-o-w-n... We're UP?.
Mood:  d'oh
Now Playing: Day 2948-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Not only does life... unexpectedly happen. But so do unexpected issues... major first day new website release crashes.


All went well early this morning with selective online invites to those first to view the new website. All was going A-OK, until around 1pm then... POOF!.. that's all she wrote.

I anticipated issues within the very first week for our new website. What I didn't anticipate was such a major crash within the very first few hours. GEESH! Yes, it does come with the territory when launching any new website. It's only to be anticipated, because let's face it, life happens. Especially when least expected. If anyone knows how this goes, it's little ole me.

So... I have been working over the past several hours with the software developer and a few others within the new website serving host. I am very happy to say that issues should be resolved by early tomorrow evening. YAYYY!!

Thanks to those who have already given their HIGH MARKS of APPROVAL! Quite a few chuckles and a whole lotta laughs among those in cyber world! Even those who just wanted to let me know, "Hey! I can totally relate to a few of your Podcast-Blogcast episodes!" Your much appreciated words of approval let me know that we are most definitely onto the next best phase of a super blog on steroids so to speak! Hehehehehehe!

Thank you everyone for your ongoing patience. I hope as well you too enjoy the new website with all the bells and whistles!

You know what time it is tomorrow...

 TIME TO CELEBRATE with colorful hats, fancy blowouts, sparkling candles and the biggest cupcake one could ever dream of and more!!


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: February 2, 2018 3:24 AM EST
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January 31, 2018
The 20-Day Countdown... Begins.
Mood:  rushed
Now Playing: Day 2947-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Thank goodness for Eric taking a message early this morning when central scheduling called to go over my surgery date and other information at 8am. After some much needed rest, I was finally able to call them back at 3pm.

It took me awhile to finally get to sleep. I have yet to get feeling better, but was only told it would be expected. Lots of rest and just taking it easy until surgery. We really had hoped for surgery to be scheduled for next week. This way I wouldn't have too long of a chance to allow my brain to run wild with surgical possibilities and other 'what-if' scenarios. I would much rather just get this surgery one and done, ASAP! But instead... we were given a date of February 20th.

The 20-day countdown... begins.

As of late this evening. We are actually thankful to have 20 days to figure out a game plan. During a very lengthy phone call with the surgery department, I was advised to begin a medication given to me by my specialist yesterday. Quite scary medication that honestly... I rather not take nor put myself at risk of far-too-many side effects. But the unfortunate part of this, is that this time, I have no other choice. By 8pm, I finally had the courage to get my brain face on as I began the first round of medication. What I had yet to tell Eric was the 15-weeks of outpatient therapy that I will have to endure, regardless of the outcome of surgery. A 15-week course of therapy, once a day, 7-days a week. That news delivered to Eric late this afternoon... well... to say he is still shocked would be an understatement. We have already maxed out leave time with his employer. Another unfortunate, yet unexpected turn of events regarding an ongoing battle with my health. I am now finding myself feeling as if I have become a huge burden. It's not a pleasant feeling dealing with health issues that are still spiraling out of control. Far out of my own control. This is where great counseling helps one to put things into perspective.

I have to remember that what is going on... what has been going on... what is taking place... what will be happening during and after surgery isn't my fault. No one asks to be sick.

Outpatient therapy to help filter out my kidneys and bladder will be done back across state lines for a course of 15-weeks, 7-days a week, 4-5 hours per daily treatment. To say that I am feeling a bit overwhelmed by all this news, would be an understatement. I have already handled more than any normal human being could ever handle in a lifetime. Yet, it still isn't the end of my lifetime. I am living, breathing and through it all, still somehow fighting. How in the heck do I do it? With the help of my guardian angels. It is something that I have always believed, deep in my heart, to be true.

Over the next few days, while I am doing my best to deal with another new course of therapy and the medications not-so-welcoming side effects. Eric has already begun doing his best to figure out how in the world we are going to pull everything off in a matter of 20-days. A green letter written to the Sheriff requesting donated hours, generously donated by fellow employees, coworkers that over the years have become good friends. We don't do well asking for help. I assume that's where pride somehow always gets in the way. But life happens... everyone at some point of their life... sometime in their lifetime... can't win the battle alone. There will be a time, in everyone's lifetime, where asking for help is perfectly... okay.

Eric will not be able to work during the 15-weeks of outpatient therapy, back across state lines, in Ohio. It's going to be hard enough driving back and forth, especially when not feeling well. But somehow, we will find a way to make it work. We always have... always will. Maybe the new website that will be officially released tomorrow really does have a place in this current part of my journey. In more ways, than one.

Another means to find a reason to laugh and share a smile. A therapeutic way to get through the rough road ahead. 


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: February 1, 2018 2:03 AM EST
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January 30, 2018
Stable... Unstable.
Mood:  quizzical
Now Playing: Day 2946-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


What Eric could had used more of this morning was some serious coffee! Another far-too-early morning wake up call for my surgical procedure. All in 'hopes' of keeping my functioning kidney out of harms way from, once again, getting blocked from the reappearing ovary and large ovarian tumor. A surgically placed stent to fully free my left ureter tube that helps drain my kidney.

But as with life... expect the unexpected.

Rewind a few days, back to results from an emergency rescan. Hoping to make some sort of sense from existing and new symptoms. Far too much blood in the urine. Way too much uncomfortable pain. Enough nausea which doesn't allow for a need to consume much, if any protein shakes or other valuable daily nutrition.

17 surgeons later... three big specialty hospitals-mayo clinics later and maximum experimental oncology treatments. Yet, everyone has their own respective opinions regarding an ovary that has magically re-appeared after pathology reports show it being surgery removed several years ago. Yet, one single microscopic fragment that grew over the course of several years has done more than enough damage that still to this very day... continues. ORS-Ovarian Remnant Syndrome, one in now 13 in the world that still has gone above and beyond all the other 12 documented cases. Not only did this bizarre, magical ovary of many sorts grow back from one, single, microscopic fragment. But has once again defied all odds of being placed in a deep, permanent state of sleep. Last weeks emergency scan shows not just one magical ovary producing follicles. But now my right ovary is awakening from the deep radiation sleep. Another three follicles appearing on the big screen which makes for two separate ovaries, functioning on two different cycles. Not only is this unheard of by most, but as well it's the nightmare of sorts that my team of specialists were hoping would never happen... again. Which is why fast-track, maximum course of radiation therapy and a few other experimental treatments were used, yet still failed to shut down the feeding blood supply to this medical mess.

Stable... Unstable.

The only good part of the page upon page of reports was with regards to one word, 'Stable.' This means that the largest tumor and smaller tumors have remained pretty much stable since my last scan. They have only grown a slight bit, not much since the last scan. However, there is still an active feeding blood supply to all areas of the tumors and magical re-appearing ovary. Stable... is a most welcoming and encouraging word for someone like me with a very rare medical case.

What isn't a very welcoming nor encouraging word... unstable.

Once arriving for my surgical procedure this morning. I was asked to fill out a few additional forms of needed medical information and other releases. They also asked if I could provide a morning urine sample, which I only thought was possibly routine before the procedure. Then we were whisked away to the waiting area before being directed into an examination room, literally waiting a little over an hour for my specialist to come in and delivery the news. Expect the unexpected... it comes with the territory.

This mornings surgical procedure to place a stent got canceled as labs showed a far larger amount of blood coming from my kidneys than just last week. There were also cells, not good cells, that were detected which gave my specialist no other option but to cancel the procedure. We were then told the other unexpected news, "I am going to have to schedule you for exploratory surgery and biopsy of your bladder and kidney. We have a very high suspicion of cancer within the bladder or possibly the left kidney." Not the news anyone in their right frame of mind wants to hear. Myself and Eric were in no way, shape or form ready for that kind of news nor having the anticipated procedure this morning literally canceled within a last second notice.

Cancer? Again? Bladder? Kidney?

I just successfully beat skin cancer. I would never dare to say that it was an easier form of cancer. But instead, I would rather say that the location and options to treat skin cancer are far greater than other types of cancers. To now come face to face with another unexpected turn is not only frustrating, but downright frightening. I went from one report showing tumors... stable. To now other aspects with regards to labs and reports... unstable.

What about the new third option with regards to making our move out west this year that much easier? As of this evening, we are still trying to come to the realization of cells so out of control that things have now gotten way out of control. We are now facing a far bigger surgery. A major surgery with regards to two completely different types of cancer... or is it really? In my mind, if this doesn't go very well since labs are now worse than just last week, this is all connected. Things like this just don't happen. No way. No how. The only silver lining I see in today's news is hopefully things haven't had the chance to go beyond the point of medical intervention. Once again, another specialist who looked up at us across the desk with their computer, letting us know that any doctor who brushed things off with regards to my unique medical case and ongoing symptoms didn't help matters. If anything, they allowed things to get worse. Medically speaking, nothing got better. If that is so much as they had hoped or planned.

Maybe Mother Nature will bring us a huge snowstorm as they have predicted to possibly come visit us here in the county later this week. I could use a few smiles or two or three or four.


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 10:31 PM EST
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January 29, 2018
Guess Who Just Turned 6-Months Old! :)
Mood:  party time!
Now Playing: Day 2945-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


Why look who just turned 6-months old today!


She may be all girl, but still loves to hang with her best friend Mr. Snoreo. A bit terror on all four paws at times... but still the ultimate CUTIE~PATOOTIE!

So much for the 40-45 pounds that our veterinarian guessed as far as her max weight. Babyblue is already just a few pounds shy of 40 pounds at 6-months old! We have a really strong hunch where this could be possibly going... BIG DINOSAUR PUPPY! Hehehehehehe! Just like our Snoreo who is pretty close at maxing out around 103 pounds. That's one GINORMOUS puppy! Together they make for one huge adventurer! Especially with Eric trying to wrangle both of them while opening up the gate at our local dog park. Babyblue is already past the point of me trying to handle her while walking. She is already far too strong for me and way too rambunctious! It's a good thing that both her and Snoreo have become best of friends and such great playmates while burning off lots of energy in and out of the house! What we need next is a fenced in yard after having to tear down the newly (poorly) installed fence only a few months after purchasing our home.

Our new third option with regards to our next and final move out west is still in the works. At least with this third option, there is a fenced in backyard. Tomorrow is my scheduled surgical procedure to put in the stent. If all goes well, we should be on our way to taking advantage of a third option which will allow our move out west this year to be that much easier!

But as with life... expect the unexpected. No matter how meticulously things may be planned. Life can change in an instant. Life happens and so do change of plans.

What will never change is the unconditional love and endless hugs from all of our super affectionate fur children. Even from Mr. Big ole lap kitty, Papa.

Love doesn't get any better than happy purrs and smiling eyes from our big and small bundles of joy~ 

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 30, 2018 9:08 PM EST
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January 28, 2018
A Most Beautiful Star~My Guardian Angel *:)
Mood:  special
Now Playing: Day 2944-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


When the stars align... amazing things start to happen for a person.

A most perfect star, my guardian angel, has been greeting me lately during the late evening hours. Looking outside our cloud themed room to see one, single, solitary, most beautiful bright star twinkling above me from the heavens.

Allowing the wind to direct my sail in the right direction. Allowing fate to guide me the way. When something is truly meant to be... it will happen on it's very own. I always felt this to be true in life. When you let go of the reins of trying to control your life. Giving in to a far higher power... my guardian angel. That single, most beautiful twinkling star, greeting me each and every night was helping to guide me in the right direction.

When the stars align... amazing things will start to happen in the most unexpected ways.

Decades ago... I would had never embraced so much change. Constant change that mostly has been out of this gals control. But with age comes wisdom and plenty of lifetime experience. I now welcome and embrace change, all change that may come before me. I have learned to fully embrace change and not to fear taking those huge leaps of faith.... because in all actuality.... change can be a really good thing! Change can be the most rewarding gift of all.

There are big changes that have already begun to quickly unfold this morning for our entire little family. Positive change, welcoming change, exciting change, the most HAPPIEST of HAPPY change! By letting go of those reins and allowing life to take the wheel. I have come to realize that when things are meant to be... they truly will happen.

Never doubt, always believe and have faith.

Allow your guardian angel to guide you the way~

Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 29, 2018 1:34 AM EST
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January 27, 2018
Ready To Take That LEAP Of FAITH! :)
Mood:  surprised
Now Playing: Day 2943-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


If you walk through life and always remember to expect the unexpected. You will then never find yourself the least bit surprised nor disappointed.

We have hit a major crossroad. A huge cut in the road so to speak with regards to another new opportunity that has unexpectedly opened.

Rise n' Shine to a far too early weekend morning! An unexpected drive to view a property. Always... when least expected. We now have further options and more major decisions to make with our big move. This move is turning out to be more like an international chess championship game! These aren't moves that can be rapidly made... no way... these moves take some serious meetings of the minds. We now have another option on the table. This doesn't mean that moving out west is no longer a go. It just means that we no longer just have one option of selling our current home. We now have three options on how this entire big move can play out to our advantage. If this new option goes into the direction where the wind may take us... then we will only have a mere month to quickly finish up any last minute repairs and repainting projects. EEEE~YIKES! Talking about Eric on the hustle! This gals body is on a major time-out for the time being, so I won't be able to help with a possible upcoming month of sheer madness.

We have some really big and quite serious decisions to make within the next few days. I always tell Eric that the universe will let you know... always has... always will. If things are meant to be... they will be meant to be.

Things can go one of three ways. But regardless... they are all super exciting! I am soooooo ready for this next phase of life. A major do-over with plenty of happiest of happy days ahead!


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
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January 26, 2018
Any GREAT Parent Would Had Made The Same Decisions!
Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: Day 2942-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


What an emotionally spent day! 


The one thing I can't stand is stress that beats you senseless... mentally and emotionally. In my opinion, by my own far too many personal experiences. Mental and emotional stress is harder on the body than physical stress or physical pain.

Mental and emotional stress can literally wipe the hell out of a person! Coming down off of the emotionally spent high? Unexplainable.

Lately, I have been back-tracking decisions that I have made in order to protect someone. A stepchild of sorts. Decisions made over the years by myself. But I wasn't alone. You see, these weren't just spontaneous decisions. They were decisions that were also verified and deemed appropriate by a therapist who counsels children, pre-teens, adolescents and even teenagers. Decisions placed in front of me that were not taken lightly. Especially when they involve a stepchild. Decisions that I truly believe were for the best with regards to keeping the young individual out of any highly combative, highly emotional conflict among blood members. I also had to make a very hard decision in keeping the stepchild away from being front and center. Watching me endure oncology treatments. Coming home, day-after-day, puking until I more so resembled a Casper the Ghost kind of parental figure. I really deep in my heart believe that those decisions of protecting a young individual, a stepchild, were the right decisions.

Or... at least I thought so.

Over the past few weeks a few individuals have been highly critical with regards of my decisions. Protecting a stepchild with everything I got. My theory has always remained the same with regards to human children and fur children. You don't have to birth a child from your body in order to be a good parent. I believe that parental instinct should just come naturally. The Mother Bear and Fur Mother instincts of protecting your young, no matter what and with everything you got! You need not be the biological parent in order to be a good parent. Being a great parent means making decisions to always protect the young. Making critical, yet sometimes, the hardest decisions you may ever face in your lifetime in order to make sure that child, children or fur children are safe and as happy as possible. In a really happy and safe environment when sometimes hostile issues, highly combative, emotionally driven unnecessary conflict arises and even when health matters take front and center. Unexpected and yet highly unpredictable life events.

Over the years, I have personally had to make some really tough decisions. Yet, I always made sure to reiterate those decisions very carefully with a professional that counsels young individuals. Lately, I have had to face my decisions and swallow the consequences. And not in the best of ways as some have highly criticized my decisions of protecting a stepchild by making sure they were never involved in the above life events. Those sharp criticisms and snarky comments regarding my decisions have not come lightly. Commenting to any stepparent that there are a no-body because they are a biological parent is the most rude and outrageous statement any decent human being can make. Not allowing a stepparent to see their stepchild or not allowing the stepchild the god given right to know that a stepparent is calling, checking in with regards to a stepchild, just really oversteps all boundaries of being a decent human being. I have lost a great deal of sleep while re-questioning my decisions. Yet... this evening as I type. I have come to realize that a very happy, well adjusted, extremely smart and overall, a well rounded young individual, stepchild wouldn't be such today. If it weren't for putting them first and making such critical decisions by keeping them as far as possible out of any emotionally charged harms way. Also keeping them away from watching me endure round after round of toxic oncology treatments. Coming home morning after morning, not being sure if I will make it through the next treatment. Crying myself to sleep and waking up to not even remembering the prior day.

Ask any cancer patient... the story will always be the same. One never forgets that part of their journey. Yet... most patients prefer not to discuss the horrifying events that come before and even years after oncology treatments. Many, many oncology patients whom have children and even stepchildren, have also made the same decision with regards to keeping young individuals far away from such a disturbing, life time event.  

I am not most patients. I am... me. I have made critical, yet sometimes even last minute and some even seconds with regards to making sure I protected a stepchild from less happier times.

To those whom have voiced their snarky opinions and some... even chastising me along the way regarding my decisions of not placing a young individual in adult situations and not making them suffer unnecessary stress. I beg to differ with your opinions. This evening, I was finally able to make peace with my decisions over the years by protecting the next generation from keeping them far away from adult situations that I felt... and a highly trained professional felt... were not the time nor the place for a stepchild. A young individual.

My decisions have most definitely had some serious consequences. Especially, lately. But at the end of the day. Any good... NAH!.. GREAT PARENT would had made the same decisions I have made and would had done so in a New York Minute!

Although, you may never get the chance to truly know me until much later in life. I am honored to had the god given right and chance to have known you, protected you and given you the right to the most happiest of happy life.


Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg. at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 28, 2018 12:12 AM EST
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