Any GREAT Parent Would Had Made The Same Decisions!
Now Playing: Day 2942-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining
What an emotionally spent day!
The one thing I can't stand is stress that beats you senseless... mentally and emotionally. In my opinion, by my own far too many personal experiences. Mental and emotional stress is harder on the body than physical stress or physical pain.
Mental and emotional stress can literally wipe the hell out of a person! Coming down off of the emotionally spent high? Unexplainable.
Lately, I have been back-tracking decisions that I have made in order to protect someone. A stepchild of sorts. Decisions made over the years by myself. But I wasn't alone. You see, these weren't just spontaneous decisions. They were decisions that were also verified and deemed appropriate by a therapist who counsels children, pre-teens, adolescents and even teenagers. Decisions placed in front of me that were not taken lightly. Especially when they involve a stepchild. Decisions that I truly believe were for the best with regards to keeping the young individual out of any highly combative, highly emotional conflict among blood members. I also had to make a very hard decision in keeping the stepchild away from being front and center. Watching me endure oncology treatments. Coming home, day-after-day, puking until I more so resembled a Casper the Ghost kind of parental figure. I really deep in my heart believe that those decisions of protecting a young individual, a stepchild, were the right decisions.
Or... at least I thought so.
Over the past few weeks a few individuals have been highly critical with regards of my decisions. Protecting a stepchild with everything I got. My theory has always remained the same with regards to human children and fur children. You don't have to birth a child from your body in order to be a good parent. I believe that parental instinct should just come naturally. The Mother Bear and Fur Mother instincts of protecting your young, no matter what and with everything you got! You need not be the biological parent in order to be a good parent. Being a great parent means making decisions to always protect the young. Making critical, yet sometimes, the hardest decisions you may ever face in your lifetime in order to make sure that child, children or fur children are safe and as happy as possible. In a really happy and safe environment when sometimes hostile issues, highly combative, emotionally driven unnecessary conflict arises and even when health matters take front and center. Unexpected and yet highly unpredictable life events.
Over the years, I have personally had to make some really tough decisions. Yet, I always made sure to reiterate those decisions very carefully with a professional that counsels young individuals. Lately, I have had to face my decisions and swallow the consequences. And not in the best of ways as some have highly criticized my decisions of protecting a stepchild by making sure they were never involved in the above life events. Those sharp criticisms and snarky comments regarding my decisions have not come lightly. Commenting to any stepparent that there are a no-body because they are a biological parent is the most rude and outrageous statement any decent human being can make. Not allowing a stepparent to see their stepchild or not allowing the stepchild the god given right to know that a stepparent is calling, checking in with regards to a stepchild, just really oversteps all boundaries of being a decent human being. I have lost a great deal of sleep while re-questioning my decisions. Yet... this evening as I type. I have come to realize that a very happy, well adjusted, extremely smart and overall, a well rounded young individual, stepchild wouldn't be such today. If it weren't for putting them first and making such critical decisions by keeping them as far as possible out of any emotionally charged harms way. Also keeping them away from watching me endure round after round of toxic oncology treatments. Coming home morning after morning, not being sure if I will make it through the next treatment. Crying myself to sleep and waking up to not even remembering the prior day.
Ask any cancer patient... the story will always be the same. One never forgets that part of their journey. Yet... most patients prefer not to discuss the horrifying events that come before and even years after oncology treatments. Many, many oncology patients whom have children and even stepchildren, have also made the same decision with regards to keeping young individuals far away from such a disturbing, life time event.
I am not most patients. I am... me. I have made critical, yet sometimes even last minute and some even seconds with regards to making sure I protected a stepchild from less happier times.
To those whom have voiced their snarky opinions and some... even chastising me along the way regarding my decisions of not placing a young individual in adult situations and not making them suffer unnecessary stress. I beg to differ with your opinions. This evening, I was finally able to make peace with my decisions over the years by protecting the next generation from keeping them far away from adult situations that I felt... and a highly trained professional felt... were not the time nor the place for a stepchild. A young individual.
My decisions have most definitely had some serious consequences. Especially, lately. But at the end of the day. Any good... NAH!.. GREAT PARENT would had made the same decisions I have made and would had done so in a New York Minute!
Although, you may never get the chance to truly know me until much later in life. I am honored to had the god given right and chance to have known you, protected you and given you the right to the most happiest of happy life.
Posted by GastroparesisAwarenessCampaignOrg.
at 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 28, 2018 12:12 AM EST