Mood:
luckyNow Playing: Day 731-The Final Road To Survival
What a cute site waking up to seeing Pumpkin kitty sharing the recliner with Cuddles kitty. His other sibling Precious kitty will be turning 14 years old this week. In fact all of the fur kids will turn 14 this year except for Littleblue who will be 4 years old next month. WOW! Time does fly by and she has turned out to be such a smart but big girl! Speaking of Littleblue...Since she finally finished shedding her winter coat today is her salon day at the groomers. The new place we take her has gotten so busy since they first opened November last year that we must call a week in advance to get her in to see them. She walks in looking like a fluff ball and comes out looking like a HUGE COTTON BALL! Hahahahaha! Lately she has been a bit on the not so good side begging for my Greek frozen yogurt. I let her have a tiny bite the other day and I didn't think she would like the taste of it but I was sure wrong! She loves it!!
Thankfully I was able to sleep in today since I have two specialist appointments and lots of blood work starting tomorrow. Hopefully this will be the last of seeing my doctors for quite sometime however I doubt the same will hold true for more testing. I just need a break and lately growing very tired of my Idiopathic Gastroparesis so when most ask how I am doing my typical reply is, "Same ole, same ole." I just don't want other GP'ers to think because I am going through so much they will also end up with the same problems. Gastroparesis varies from patient to patient and even the best doctors in the world can't predict the progression of our condition.What might be scary as heck for some while reading about the declining of my health doesn't necessarily mean they will go down the same exact path. I don't consider myself numb to what I am going through but instead consider myself a "Pro" only because I am used to my organs acting up at the drop of a pin. After 8 years I have grown to just accept things the way they are with my Idiopathic Gastroparesis but I still mix medical with humor. Its far easier to laugh sometimes in life than to cry.
I have received some very touching emails and letters the past few weeks which has inspired myself to get busy spreading Gastroparesis Awareness. The Gastroparesis Awareness Campaign team has come up with some amazing and new ideas to help raise GP Awareness this year. Today I decided its time to take the first steps in achieving our goals for 2012. There has been so many accomplishments over the past 6 years with the team that sometimes I need to be reminded that I have a purpose in life. Maybe it was never the intent that my life be cut short by this horrible GI dysmotility disorder but instead to continue being an example for others who are on the same GP journey.
This evening my friend-Caregiver went with me to the post office to drop off GP Awareness packets. One in particular stuck out which was on its way to Hong Kong. I told my friend, "Although I might not be able to travel anymore part of me still is and all the way to HONG KONG!" Now if only I could put a small hidden camera on the outside of the large envelope and literally watch the journey. How neat would that be!! So from Ohio to Hong Kong and in the hands of Jackie Chan indeed this envelope will literally see the world and so will the great Gastroparesis Awareness Campaign mission.
CHEERS TO FUTURE SUCCESS! 
spacey
My attitude has changed the past few weeks. Its not that I don't care about my health or new problems due to my Gastroparesis progressing its just that I am tired of doctors, tests and finding out the fire in my organs-nerves are becoming further damaged. So far I have nailed the exact diagnosis on every single new symptom and problem. I honestly believe I missed my calling as a doctor years ago. Today once again I was only reaffirmed what I already suspected so in my opinion whats the sense of going through more tests and doctor visits to find out what I already know?...My friend-Caregiver brought it my attention today that he has noticed my attitude changing and feels I am losing my fight. He is a bit nervous that I might not attend my appointments so I made sure we were on the same page and in that I would go but I already know the answers. It has nothing to do with losing the fight because my boxing gloves are still on and laced tight. The fact is sometimes I get beyond frustrated with the Gastroparesis life. 
This afternoon in order to give us both a mental break we went outside to finish a few more yard work projects. I felt like the beach came to my house as my friend-Caregiver picked all the seashells I have collected over the years from Florida that were hidden under the new wheelchair ramp. When they built the ramp last year they didn't remove the shells that were landscaped around the front porch. Today I was determined to have my friend-Caregiver pick them up and place them into a tote bag this way they can be replaced around the tree in my front yard next month. I ordered a huge truck load of mulch from the city that is suppose to arrive in three weeks and the seashells will look great in their new location! Once again I will be able to enjoy the seashells and know part of the ocean will always be with me. I miss going on vacations and listening to the waves hit the sand. I am not sure if I will ever be able to visit the ocean and seagulls again but its a sad fact I must face.
I only know of two friends and fellow GP'ers who contacted me that had family gatherings. Wow! I bet if Facebook comes up with "Holiday Family Facebook Cookouts" everyone would attend! Hahahaha! No need to buy gas since prices are still going up, just log online and everyone can bring a cyber dish or dessert. 
d'oh
The last phone call was the largest Nephrologist group in the city however large doesn't always mean organized. Honestly after four hours playing phone tag with four different office workers at three different locations I wasn't even sure if this was such a great idea. If the office isn't organized it had me questioning if the doctors would be as well disorganized?...Hmmm?..I called my Gastroenterologist's office and left a message to see if they knew of any other Nephrologist's in the area but sadly there are not a lot of them. This must be a hidden specialist society-Nephrology. Hahahahaha!
Not funny though when spending a day trying to get in to see a new specialist only to end up with your hands up in the air.
Since I was too busy once I got up dealing with doctor offices my friend-Caregiver decided to jump ahead on a list of yard work projects for this week. The backyard fire pit hasn't been cleaned up in over a year and needs some serious TLC! There are tons of branches and small pieces of wood laying around the fire pit. When the time comes to enjoy it there could be instead a fire hazard going on. YIKES! Sorry, but that happened a few years ago when "someone" put a huge pile of fresh cut wood right next to the fire pit after it was lit and didn't extinguish it when they were done. I woke up at 1am looking outside in the backyard that appeared to be lit with red Xmas lights only to realize the back of the garage and grass was on fire. It only took a few hot coals from the wood to crackle and jump into the huge pile of fresh cut wood but thank goodness for my instinct to look outside and a nearby garden hose! Surely we don't need that to replay again so better safe than sorry. After two hours my friend-Caregiver not only cleaned up the entire area but also placed the extra wood near the street for the city to pick up and help turn into free mulch for the residents.
happy
We were going to do our best to attend church service yesterday evening but I was too mentally exhausted. That makes both of us! I had the wrong time wrote down for services today so sadly we missed Easter church service but welcomed a new tradition of our own at dinner here at the house saying our blessings. It was nice and something as a child I always felt made holidays seem more sincere by saying Grace at the table. Once we got up at 2pm I wasn't quite sure how the day would turn out having the first Easter in 40 years at home. The weather at least was picture perfect! I wish it would stay this exact temperature year round. Our new neighbors were even outside enjoying the weather and doing some landscaping and yard work. I haven't been feeling too well long enough to formally meet them but this afternoon we all finally met. They are the nicest couple and have such a funny sense of humor and glowing personality. In fact it seems not only our new neighbors but the ones on the other side of their house were also celebrating Easter at home. I also had quite a few friends and GP'ers who sent me holiday phone greetings from home as they decided to do things a bit different this year and celebrate at their own houses. 
Even though we celebrated Easter at home I had a list of things to do. Since it was so nice outside my friend-Caregiver played frisbee with Littleblue while Oreo enjoyed some back yard time. We took a few short walks at the park and later this afternoon went up to the cemetery to place some flowers on those who have passed onto Heaven.
Of course Easter wouldn't be Easter without the traditional basket hunt. The fur kids found theirs right away although Oreo cheated and already found his last night. The Easter bunny must had made an early stop! Hahahahaha! Funny enough I also found some empty Reese cup wrappers in the garbage once I got up but my friend-Caregiver pled the fifth. Hmmmm...The fur kids got lots of new treats and Littleblue even got a new blue frisbee.
Once they were situated me and my friend-Caregiver went to go find our own baskets. I got candy and a new Clay Aiken CD. Since my blood sugar tends to run low now its important I always keep candy around me. Sadly I can only handle two different candies and although I am tired of miniature plain Hershey bars but at least I found the new Hershey nuggets to also do fairly well. Since sugar dissolves there is less digestion needed but its still not enough to keep my sugar up so I also now use glucose tablets and gel. This is a very common symptom and problem for Gastroparesis patients. 
I had two small bites of mac & cheese and chicken. I haven't had much of an appetite lately and a few small bites was enough for me then I reached for my watered down Slimfast and frozen Greek yogurt. My friend-Caregiver enjoyed all the food and even helped clean up. The fur kids took a break from playing basket guards long enough to have their own small plate of food.
How did we end our evening? Well OF COURSE! A walk to help my friend-Caregiver work down all the food and candy treats then we got the living room couchbed and recliner together and finished up our "Ghost Adventures" marathon. CHEERS TO A HAPPY EASTER! WOOHOA!!
bright
My friend-Caregiver had to buy a few new yard tools and a weedeater so we took my crutches and headed out to run a few errands. It always feels good to get out of the house. I would love to work! I miss working! Its horrible not working but I do the best I can with life and whats in front of me. Instead of helping out in the yard I played Manager while my friend-Caregiver deweeded and touched up the flower beds and the fur kids played window Supervisor. Hahahahaha! 
My friend Kevin has been busy with his family today putting up a new swing set for the kids. His Mom has officially welcomed two new Grandchildren to the family making the total six! The nice new swing set should keep them all very happy! I couldn't believe they finished everything in one day but when you have family you have teamwork and amazing things can be accomplished. 
The yard and swing set turned out super nice! GREAT JOB KEVIN & FAMILY! They have a huge family and close extended family so it will be a large Easter gathering for them but something they all look forward to each year. 
I picked up my new prescriptions and started taking them today. Since the kidney issues haven't magically disappeared its just one more thing for my Gastroenterologist to deal with regarding my weekly Hell-In-A-Jug/Drano treatments. There is a new medication on the market he can get however it doesn't come without complications. Its injectable and "suppose" to help clear your intestines. Although they are doing their best to keep me from having to go this route it might be inevitable. For now since I just started the antibiotics they have held off my treatment today and for the rest of the weekend long enough until I am finished with them Tuesday. Funny, Tuesday? That's the same day my kidney tests come back. Mere coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not. Time will tell...
Later this evening once we got the living room couchbed and recliner situation me and my friend-Caregiver got the Easter baskets together for the fur kids. We also decided to make baskets for each other and hide them tomorrow. I got to play a bit with my new wigs and pose with Littleblue for a few holiday photos although I tend to think she wasn't too thrilled with the idea, hahahaha! 
not sure
Time to play catch up!
It looks like cooler and fall-like temperatures will be here to stay until early next week. Much dryer weather too that allows plenty of outside playtime for the fur kids. By the time its 11pm they are beat! The kitty gang have been enjoying lots of sun lounging during the day which also leaves them quite tired by early evening. Precious has been lounging with the Easter Bunnies in the spare bedroom the past few days. Pumpkin kitty has been caught by my friend-Caregiver literally laying on them. Hahahahaha! They are too funny and keep life interesting to say the least!
Honestly with the holiday weekend upon us I thought for sure we would hit lots of rush hour traffic on the way to my doctors appointment as well those who are traveling for Easter. With only 15 minutes to spare because a last minute phone call from my insurance company had me running late we still made it right on time! In fact I was the last appointment for the day not only for my specialists office but as well for the tests. BONUS! My friend grabbed an empty chair and TV remote all to himself since I was the last patient for the day. My insurance company hasn't been too kind to myself nor my specialists over the past year. In fact not only am I feeling the heat but so are my doctors and in between fighting for coverage with medical necessity testing others are fighting the insurance company on important medication coverage. Who knows what "will" or "won't" be covered today. I guess I will find out once I receive my medical claims in the next few months.
There were five health care workers who all showed true compassion and took very good care of me today! So maybe things didn't turn out as expected which is why once again I expect the worst but hope for the best but also expecting the unexpected. They needed to run further tests today to go over some problems that showed up during my hospital visits and tests. One test showed an enlarged right ovary which to most would seem abnormal but to my surgeon it wasn't because this same ovary was repaired by both of my surgeons four years ago. There were no signs of ovarian cancer, tumors, cysts, etc. GOOD NEWS! Second they ran a test to specifically narrow in on the left spinal pain that runs around my hip down the groin area and leg. It has also made my left leg continue to be numb down to my knee. What they did find during the scan and test is once one person pushed down on the exact area front to back my bowels were visibly seen fused together. My intestines are more of a tangled mess than even my surgeons expected since they did their best during my last surgery to untangle them but nope, they are fused again. This is not only causing me pain but also applying pressure to my poor spine and wrapping with them nerves that are slowly dying and being strangled. MYSTERY SOLVED! My Neurologist hit it right on the nail yesterday during my appointment because he believed it was two issues at the same time working against each other and he was right! So no ovarian cancer but one fused mess of bowels and nerves which not even the best surgeon can determine if the pain will ever ease up but now we all fully understand the importance of staying on the ole Drano treatment. AMEN! One good thing was they could see clearly through my lower bowel and were able to determine there were no perforated holes. Just another reason why I must be careful and stick on a liquid diet. 
lyrical
My friend-Caregiver initially went to pick it up for me but guess what? Since I had medication stolen from me and actually taken up to the pharmacy and filled they now have a new policy with narcotics that you must show your ID. Times that policy by 100 on my account seeing it was that one time having medically necessary medication and prescriptions stolen from me that forever changed the pharmacies policy regarding controlled substances and showing your ID. If I ever wanted to put that part of my life behind me sadly it won't be anytime soon. I deal with it every time I pick up a medication. Seeing like most who have dealt first hand with those who are addicted you hope they will change for the better and for themselves but you can't change people. Learning experience #110 on my end.
Since I finished the rest of my treatment the other day I forget to empty the rest sitting in the refrigerator down the drain. It was interesting watching the toxic mixture literally go down the sink drain and see the reaction when I turned on the water. It bubbled for around five minutes so just imagine the power it does to your insides. It sure made my jaw drop! YIKES! No wonder my stomach and intestines get so darn inflamed for the next three days and I get gastritis on more than a few occasions. No wonder my teeth are also suffering! If it can do this to your sink and drain I am sure it can easily eat away your insides. So....My friend-Caregiver picked up some new Listerine today that actually helps prevent tooth decay. Now the great question is can it stop decay due to liquid Drano treatments? Only time will tell but you can call me, "The first guinea pig" this evening.
celebratory
No sleep for those in pain so instead of tossing and turning then looking at my cell phone alarm I decided to just get up and make it a productive day! 
After six phone calls the kitchen cabinet full of post it notes slowly dwindled down to just three. One is for my tests and doctors appointment Friday, one for a meeting tomorrow early afternoon and the other is for hopefully my LAST doctors appointment next week so I can at least take a little bit of a break. Hell-In-A-Jug day is right around the corner as I am advised to go back on a strict liquid diet. WATCH OUT WORLD! This means my irritability will be in full swing! Hahahahaha! I would love to stick a few people I know on the full liquid diet just for the learning experience. Might help them to see how it finally feels living a Gastroparesis life.
sharp
This is getting old!!!! I feel like I have plenty more patience to give but sometimes one pain affects you completely different than the others when its in your tailbone area and wraps around your entire leg. I can't sleep on my left side, I can't sleep on my back and I can't sleep on my right side unless I continue to hang my left leg over the couch or rest it on the step stool. The living room is once again looking like a make shift medical supply store. Hahahahaha! Add crutches now to the mix. Whether I like it or not I must admit keeping weight off my left leg and spine is a heck of a lot better than constantly enduring the stabbing hot nerve pain! The wheelchair is a great idea but its still uncomfortable to find a position that doesn't make things worse.
With not much sleep last night I still managed to get up once my cell phone alarm went off at 1pm. 1pm to most is a time you wake up during vacation but trust me being sick and disabled is NO VACATION by any means. Its exhausting but far from fun. Amen! I had post it note reminders waiting for me once I got up and I wanted to try getting through most of them before my Neurologist-Neurosurgeon appointment later this afternoon. This week and next week I like to call "Hell Weeks" but I must keep in mind all bad things eventually do come to an end. My friend Kevin always makes sure I keep those exact words in mind when having a stressful day. 
So we left my specialists office with exactly as expected-more information and medical education. Maybe not a cure or a magic pill but remember I am the type of person who does better "in the know" than the "unknown." Since I still have quite a few tests and doctors appointments over the next few weeks they will wait to see what things show and then my team of amazing specialists will take things from there. Its a very strong possibility there isn't anything further they can do but try to manage the pain. I am looking at a 90% possibility. If only my tired body wasn't so tired they could discuss surgical options but those are out of the question so for now I continue to take things one day at a time.
lazy
With two specialist appointments lined up this week on top of other things that must get done I am already feeling mentally exhausted. Its one thing to be physically exhausted but a completely different situation having both at the same time. I didn't get much sleep last night due to nerve pain making its way around my left leg. Luckily my Neurologist-Neurosurgeon decided to bump up my appointment so I see him tomorrow. He totally understands the nerve pain I am experiencing but needs to make sure I continue having proper blood flow to my leg. This afternoon I did my best utilizing the crutches and although it did help a bit with the lower spinal pain it also was tiring as heck so I quickly gave up and resorted back to my cane. 
Last night we had some wicked storms and once again the summer like temperatures have made their way back. The constant change in season is starting to effect all of us so we decided to have a very lazy evening...My friend-Caregiver's allergies are finally getting to him so he is even utilizing wearing masks outside. The grass grew back in a matter of days so once again it will need to be cut. Masks work great but not 100%. I have a hunch it will be a restless night of sleep for him tomorrow and a very exhausting week for me.
"Man - a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired."