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The Road Before & After Surgery
December 27, 2017
A New Year 2018... A Year Of Sheer, Undeniable, Well Deserved HAPPINESS! :)
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: Day 2913-Chapter 3... Happiness~My Silver Lining


That old saying is true... all good things must come to an end.

Christmas is now over and the reality of issues that need to be resolved before the years end has officially started back up today. We have to come to some sort of agreement with regards to our mere 13-month old home purchase here in the country. The bank that holds Eric's VA loan has been not only uncooperative, adding over $147,000 onto his existing loan without his knowledge. But once again... we had to reach out for more legal assistance. I am very happy to say that contacting the attorney not only moved the urgent issues with the bank into light speed mode. But as well, once again, we were met with another anticipated retaliation. Eric's entire payment history was not only incorrect, missing over 9 payments with all three credit bureaus. But the bank took it upon themselves to delete his entire loan from all three credit bureaus after an attorney stepped into the picture. It's like living in a rental, all over again. So... this morning it was strongly advised by the attorney to put a freeze on his credit with all three credit bureaus. The freeze will remain until the bureaus can figure out why in the world a bank would do such a ridiculous retaliation move by falsifying over $147,000 onto his existing loan. So far... the attorney was told, "It was a mental error."

UMMMM?.... O-K-A-Y... Sureeeeeee!

It seems as if we are right back to ground zero with missing payments not being reported to the credit bureaus and an underwriter with our personal bank unable to proceed with any sale of our current home. Eric had the unfortunate news this morning to deliver to the couple that lives only a mere five minute drive from our home that were in the process with their own bank. Purchasing our home. What a mess! I don't understand, nor does our personal bank underwriter understand why mere errors could not be resolved by the current bank that holds Eric's VA loan. It makes absolutely no sense to anyone. But unfortunately after the attorney did some research of his very own. Eric is not the first consumer to have this same issue with the same bank over the past several years. In fact... the bank got taken to court by a federal bureau just a mere few years ago. They were sited this year, March 2017 to pay over 1.7 million dollars in fines for failure to properly report consumer payments and failure to timely respond to error reporting with the credit bureaus. The bank had so many complaints that the federal bureau ended up stepping in and taking them to court. I can't believe that it didn't help matters... because clearly the issues with the same bank not reporting payments or fixing their own clerical errors has continued to this very day.

I like to call this another mere unnecessary form of stress. Which is why here-on-out when anyone causes any unnecessary stress.... I remove myself from it, them, they or all of the above.

2017 will end as a year of many doors that will remain closed. And for good reason!

2018 will be the start of a new year with many new doors that I will open as a means to living a life here on out with nothing but sheer... HAPPINESS! 

It's been a long time coming for this gal. I more than deserve it! Anything or anyone to cause mere unnecessary stress, drama or any other shenanigans will find themselves at the door. Closed... permanently. I will not give second chances any more. I have given far too many individuals and situations far too many chances. I have given far too much forgiveness that has been taken for granted. It's time to welcome a new year and the time I deserve to focus on myself and my little family for a change. Time to be nothing but selfish.

You have to take care of number 1... YOU!

Your happiness is first and foremost important!

Eric has his own changes that he has already began initiating on a daily basis. How to handle conflict, problems and other issues that may arise during this crazy journey we call, life. He hasn't handled things to the best of his ability. He will also be the very first to admit it. But as I have learned over the past several years. You can't change people. We all have to own up to our own mistakes. We have to want embrace change. In the process, we all become a better version of ourselves each and every day.

Today, I have also learned a very important lesson about being a stepparent. Over the years, I have kept in contact with regards to how my stepson has been doing. I have also made sure to leave messages with the appropriate parties when he has been unavailable to contact. As any good stepparent, I have protected my stepson over the past several years from any and all stressful situations, family conflicts or any other unhealthy situations or environments. Today, I learned that my stepson was never given those messages. He never got the messages left on voicemails. He never even got the messages of me checking in with him. I will be the first to say that hearing that from his grandparents, not letting my stepson know that I have been in contact, checking in on him and other means of sending things via mail was extremely shocking and beyond hurtful. I was told that... no... they never did let him know. He was never relayed any of the messages or anything else to say the least. That not only cut me very deeply, emotionally. But a great lesson is to be learned from years of being a stepparent and protecting my stepson. One in which, I will not repeat ever again. It's really a shame... when you think about it. It will take me quite awhile to get over it. But as well, I have a lot of conversation ahead to explain to my stepson. On why he was never given the messages. His stepmom cared deeply about him and his overall happiness and wellbeing. He just never found out because his grandparents kept it from him. Indeed an injustice to any child. Indeed... a shame.

As of today... I started back seeing my new therapist here in the country. I also had a really good meeting of the minds with my LC. There will be further swift changes that have already began this evening.

I am very proud of myself to say, that I have come a very long way! I am a far happier, brighter and forever wiser woman. Thanks to closing those doors and the lessons they have provided me along the way. 


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