Going WAY WAY Past My Comfort Zone...
Mood:  lucky
Now Playing: Day 806-The Final Road To Survival

Today was one of those days when you let the winds pick you up and take you some where you haven't been in years. After almost a decade for me it was:

FISHING! WOOHOA!!

My doctors continue to be adamant by saying, "Things are progressing and getting worse. Your insides are slowly becoming toxic and there is no turning back. The temporary bandaids are no longer working." Today also made me realize what my specialists are seeing during scans which is one huge megacolon that has not only stopped working but has stretched and is applying pressure to my lungs. My intestines are so darn inflamed I am now feeling the shortness of breath more frequently. I also noticed in some photos taken this afternoon at the lake the severe inflammation it is causing around my abdominal area. Did it finally scare me? Yes. A bit.

So after getting some bad news that this surgery will mostly likely become a 3 stage process that will be discussed with me this coming Friday I finally realized that just talking about life is too short isn't enough. Now I am literally scrambling to do what I love the most. Being around water is one of them. Ahhhh....There is nothing quite like hearing waves hit the shore, even if its not the ocean but instead a really huge and nice lake.

Call me, "SUPER SPONTANEOUS" now because if there is anything I want to do I am willing to run a risk to do so and if that means going way-WAY outside my comfort zone then so be it. AMEN! Eric knows how much I miss being near the water and since right now we must wait to find out the next step towards surgery we can't head down south right now. I wouldn't be able to drive with my deteriorating spine however I would risk it all and fly if it meant seeing the ocean one last time. You ever have that feeling that things aren't looking so good with your health? I have had a rude reality check lately with my specialists and of course today after my first fishing trip in years I found myself taking more frequent breaks in order to catch my breath.

DARN GP!

The lake was only a 15 minute drive from our house. I hadn't been there in over 10 years. So many things had changed but it still remained crystal clean and the water was perfect! They added a few new docks, picnic tables, gazebos and new walking trails. Not only is this a great place to fish but could even be a new place to walk. It wasn't even five minutes once we found a spot with lots of shade that two malard ducks made their way up to us. Do they know I will feed them or what?! Eric said, "Ok, Wildlife Mom I guess they know you have a stash of bread with you. How they know though I have no idea?.." Hahahaha! They just "know." Since it was only 82 degrees today with lots of wind and little humidity we stayed for a little over two hours with lots of breaks in between so my back didn't lock up. Thank goodness for the walking trails. Eric spent more time messing with his fishing pole and changing out the floater and weights. Hahahaha! Let's just say the last time these fishing poles were used was in Florida on a pontoon boat out in the middle of the ocean. The reel was full of sand so his pole kept locking up on him so it was smart to bring two extra fishing poles. I used the one I bought on my last trip down south so it was smooth sailing for me although the only thing that was biting at the lake was the ducks and geese who were eating the loaf of bread I brought with us. Who cares though because I had a great time! I forgot what fun it was fishing and how relaxing too!

We had plenty of shaded places at the lake to fish so I didn't get overheated or burnt. The sun was behind us so my head didn't suffer and we brought plenty of fluids and "what if" medication. All in all it was a perfect day and it sure brought back some fond memories. It was an emotional evening when even this gal started to finally fully understand the seriousness of my fragile health. Maybe I can visit Florida again one day soon. Maybe together as family we can visit the coast again for one last time by putting our differences aside before its too late. I still hold onto hope because in my life that's all I have left...

To get up in the morning only to know that you will have to face another obstacle takes strength.

To smile when the only thing you want to do is cry takes bravery.

To act happy & laugh when you know that times are at their worst takes courage.

To be joyous when the only good news is the best of the bad news takes support.

To be there & help others through the roughest times in life takes love.